Shit My Players Say

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The wonderful wit, witticism, and weirdness of tabletop gamers. Need help submitting a quote? Check our FAQs!

Want advice on how to run a game, play a game, or find a game? Try the RPG Stack Exchange, @lfglistings, and Roll20!

New reader? Bored and looking for a laugh? Check out a random quote!


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  • “All your bones are equally broken”

    DM after our communist dwarf jumped down into a pool full of air. He always jokes that he wants to kill everyone equally, survived the fight with one HP because he wanted to spread is damage amongst every enemy equally and then forget there was nothing in that pool.

    • July 16, 2019 (1:08 am)
    • 635 notes
    • #shit my players say
    • #dnd
    • #rpg
    • #submission
    • #don't mess with the dm
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