Shit My Players Say

for context, we’re a crew of pirates who got a barrel of moonshine from another crew. we keep it in our kitchen but our fighter is a tad bit of an alcoholic. 

Ri (fighter) ooc: i stick my face in the barrel of moonshine and my eyes are open 

DM: you are blinded. you stuck your open eyes into a barrel of straight alcohol. You Are Blinded. 

Ri ooc: WAIT WAIT CAN I GO BACK

DM: sure. 

Ri ooc: i stick my face back in the barrel but with my eyes closed this time! 

DM: make a constitution save 

Ri rolls a 5

DM: yep you’re blinded

after a bit of conversation of how Ri is a Bethesda glitch in real life 

Ri ooc: can i reload a save state and go back and undo this

DM: you know what. yes. roll to see if you can invoke save states 

Ri rolls a 16, success

DM: you call upon a save state and you find yourself standing in the kitchen once more, with a memory of what had just happened. the god that is in your head tells you “Ri, third time’s not the charm, do not do this again. i swear to me.” and Sheena (artificer) slaps you.